Woke up this morning to my youngest screaming and crying…Alaina came upstairs to let me know that Julianna’s lip is bleeding. Super-fucking-duper. Laina threw a ball at her face and busted her lip open…all before 8 AM. Really? REALLY? Ugh.

All I want is to go back to bed. I woke up feeling queasy and disgusting and I’ve made it through toast, but still feel 85% yuck. My toast was pretty delicious, however, because it had homemade strawberry-raspberry jam on it. Yum! I’m thinking of having more, because it was that yummy. Also, I would super appreciate it if my stomach quit being such a super douche and allowed me to live my life. Right now I’m afraid that doing very much would result in a inglorious upchuck of toast and jam. Which I choose to avoid at all costs, thankyouverymuch.

In other more interesting news, Andrew went back to work this month. Yay! It’s been a little stressful for me, mostly because I miss him, but also because I’m pretty worried he’s not 100% better and being back may land him with an additional back surgery and even more time off. He’s supposed to get moved to another department, where he will be doing less physically intensive work…and man that would be a relief to me. He’s worried it’s going to be too boring and monotonous, but he’s only 25, and his body does not appreciate the intense physical labor (obviously). I just want him to be healthy and happy, and knowing I mostly have no control over that gets to me at times.

Joyous things: my best friend is pregnant! And it’s a little girl! And OMG, it’s so much fun to get to look at baby things and plan a baby shower and watch her belly grow. I love it! I may have a baby obsession…just maybe. She’s almost 17 weeks along. It’s just all so exciting! She’s wanted this for quite some time, and it’s just so gratifying to see the people I love have good things happen to them. Now, if only she can find a house she loves and buy it! I feel for her, having to do the baby thing and the house thing at once. Buying a house was SO stressful for me, I wouldn’t wish that on any pregnant lady.

Off to make myself more toast and lay down while the girls nap. Hopefully to get my stomach to chill out!

It’s been approximately two billion years since I posted a blog here.  Anywhere.  I love writing and I miss it and I’m a big idiot.  Because…duh, I could have been writing this whole time.  Recounting my intensely interesting life to the Internets at large for widespread commiseration and/or mockery.  I have been MISSING OUT, yo.

I want to say not much has changed, but of course it has!  It’s been forever!  We bought a house, bought a car, Curtis passed away, we got two new kitties, Andrew had back surgery and has been home for the last seven months, Alaina is starting kindergarten this year…and tons more that I can’t even begin to remember.  Life is a blur these days!  That’s one thing that has definitely changed, though.  My view of life and morality.  I have come to realize that one day my grandparents will be gone, then my parents, and then one day, I’ll leave my girls behind.  Which is shocking.  In a completely ridiculous way.  It’s not as if someone just let me in on some big secret, because, hello!  We all die.  Circle of life.  Remember when Simba’s dad died?  SHIT HAPPENS, MAN.  That doesn’t really soften the blow that my days with my family are horrifically numbered.  Just thinking about that makes my head hurt.  So I try to be blissfully unaware.  Which probably means I run around looking like a wacko trying to be HAPPY for the sake of being HAPPY because one day, this endless string of tomorrows is going to cease, my punch card will be filled with holes, and it’ll be time for the big dirt nap.


I promise I haven’t gone completely batshit insane.  Probably.  Maybe.  Stay tuned.

Anyway, the theme around here lately has been BASK IN THE GLOW OF FINALLY-ARRIVED SUMMER.  (Bitch, you are late.  SO late.)  I live in California for the weather.  No one gets excited over the high price of everydamnthing or the fantabulous traffic and smog and constant tax and fee rape.  It’s the weather!  The beaches!  Wish they all could be California giiiirls!  The weather this year has been as random as teenage girl with PMS.  Sun!  Hail!  Thunder!  Sun!  The rapture is coming!  RAINSUNRAINSUNRAINRAINSUUUUUN!  This made me have a migraine for the duration of Spring.  Spring and I weren’t friends before, (thanks to allergies & asthma) and now I have a restraining order.  Plus, now my girls can wear all their adorable summer shorts and dresses and tank tops, instead of their ill-fitting winter wardrobe that I have been trying to stash in boxes for months now.  Lately it’s been all bathing suits and flip-flops and sheer summer BLISS around here.  Thank GOD.

Hmm what else…oh yes.  I’ve turned into a coupon fiend.  A madwoman!  Muahahahahaaa!  Ahem.  Okay, not a total nutso.  Close enough, though.  With Andrew off of work, we’ve had to restructure our entire budget and we’re struggling a ridiculous amount to just be able to pay for the basics.  I’ve been at it for about a month, and so far have cut our groceries/toiletries budgets in HALF.  All because of coupons.  It’s amazing!  I feel like a lot fewer people would be hurting so badly if they understood that their Sunday newspaper had a section of free money in it.  Or that you can print free money right off the internet that’s totally legit.  I love it!  It’s a lot of work, a lot of trial and error, but mostly, it’s very rewarding to be able to know that I can pay my bills and feed my kids.  Learning that not all activities have to cost an arm and a leg and two chickens and your first-born.  We’ve been to a museum, a zoo, the movies, and rented a TON of movies in the last month, all for free.  It makes me so happy to feel like I can afford to give my kids all these great experiences and it doesn’t have to take away from anything else.  I’m sure I’ll be talking more and more and MORE about couponing and all the great deals I have gotten as time goes on!

Guess what?  It’s garbage day around these parts.  Well, technically tomorrow is garbage day, but we’re going to the movies (for FREE) bright and early.  Right now, Andrew is bear-hugging the ottoman in his sleep, and the garbage is his thing.  What I’m trying to say is, I have to go poke a sleeping bear.  I may or may not be mauled.  Either way, I gotta go.

Goodnight, internet peoples.  I has missed you muchly.

Oy. This morning I woke up to dreary skies and a sniffly, snotty Alaina. Poor munchkin caught the plague from an unknown source, and is now sneezing/coughing all over the place. I don’t have very much faith that the rest of us won’t follow suit, and man, is this going to be rough. Julianna has never had a cold before, and sick babies are NOT happy campers. Neither are sick husbands, and while I’m taking care of sick babes, I don’t know if I’ll have the strength to baby Andrew like every man craves.

What is it with men, anyway? I had some sort of AWFUL virus a while back, puking all over the place and doubled over with horrific, gut-wrenching stomach cramps. I got treated somewhat like I was exaggerating. A man gets the sniffles and it’s all over. They are going to DIE, they lay on the couch moaning piteously about being toooo haaaaawt and then they are freeeeezing, and then before you know it, they’re hungry and can’t find the remote and need a tissue and a dose of Dayquil and wah wah wahhhhh. If you’re not available to wait on them hand on foot, you clearly do not love them and my GAWD, how DARE you be in the bathroom, he needs VAPOR RUB, you selfish whore. Ahem. I don’t have issues with sick husbands, I swear!  I think I’m just in need of a little TLC now and then to combat this (slight) bitterness.

Moving on… I ordered an exersaucer from Amazon, and it’s not here yet. It says it should be here tomorrow, but I am of little faith. The tracking info says it was shipped on the 29th, but nothing else. As far as I know, my exersaucer is still in Kentucky. Which, no… bad… NOT OKAY. I need that thing! My sanity! It is at stake here! Please, please deliver my exersaucer tomorrow, FedEx people. A sick toddler and a baby who could be getting sick and a mom who could very well lose the three effing marbles she is so desperately clinging to would really appreciate it.

P.S., it looks like it may just rain around these parts in the near future. Andrew broke my windshield wipers mid-summer, and hasn’t found the time (too busy playing with his boat) to fix them yet. If you don’t hear from me soon, it may be because I have killed him.

Today I had jury duty and completely forgot all about it. COMPLETELY. I have been looking at the slip of paper for over a week, which is sitting on my computer desk as a reminder to NOT FORGET to call and let them know that I’m not coming, they can’t make me, so THERE. Though I must admit, I feel the need to confess. A little part of me was actually kind of intrigued by it all. They want me? ME? I must be special or something. Maybe it would be a big interesting murder trial or something. While I realize that it’s not very nice to fantasize about a person being murdered and the need of a murder trial to inject a bit of interest into my boring life, I can’t say that I didn’t have a moment or two where I actually considered doing everything within my power to ditch the kidlets with an unsuspecting relative in order to fulfill my civic duty. (Award for best run-on sentence ever goes to… (wait for it)… ME!)

I was reminded that I had somewhere to be as I talked on the phone with a friend of mine, and she said something about a county clerk (some sort of clerk, I don’t know) in a book she’s reading. Clerk? Jury DUTY! Expletive, expletive! Then I got off of the phone and called the court, where I sat on hold for no less than twenty minutes before my phone abruptly hung up. Needs charging, read the caller-id. Niiiice. I’m going to go TO JAIL to be beaten with sticks because you are a needy shithead who needs to be charged CONSTANTLY, lest you just give up and die. Hate, hate, red-hot HATE you, cheap stupid VTech phone.

So I haven’t talked to anyone from the court yet, and I honestly don’t know what to do. Call and beg? Be honest and tell them that I read the paper extensively doing the one-eyed mom speed-read? Feed them my excuses? Plead for a break because MY KIDS, they make me insane and my HUSBAND, he worked every day last week except Sunday and it’s his fault I don’t know what day it is and my PHONE, wouldn’t let me call if I even really, really wanted to? Blech. Blah. Wretch. Help?

So on Monday when I said that I would post the results of Julianna’s well check on Tuesday, that was a big fat LIE. Sorry, life got a little bit hectic, as it sometimes does with children in tow. I really can’t blame my kids this time, because my mother was here Sunday night through Thursday night. No time for blogging, no time for photo editing. Now that mom went home, I have more time for stuffing my face with Wheatables and playing in Lightroom while the kidlets nap.

Lia is now tipping the scales at 16 pounds, and she’s a whopping 26 inches tall. While she is only in the 50th percentile for her weight and height, she is in 6-9 month clothes, already having outgrown her newborn, 0-3, and 3-6 month sized outfits. She’s already getting so big, so independent. She’s eating solids (I use the term “solids” loosely), and even some rudimentary crackers and cookies. She’s sitting up. She’s rolling and scooting all over the dang place. She’s even getting up on her sweet little hands and pudgy little knees, giving her belly full ground clearance. She rocks back and forth and gurgles and coos until she inevitably falls, only to get right back up again. That’s my girl.

I look my chubby little Lia and how big she’s already gotten, and I feel so robbed. I feel stupid for lamenting for a single moment, much less months, that she was a girl baby and so we may be done having children (for hubby’s fear of a third girl) (not the end of the effing WORLD, in my opinion). I had a hard time truly bonding with her because of that, until I really took some time to examine my feelings and realize how selfish I was being. She is a beautiful, healthy little girl, and to wish for anything besides her was wrong from day one. I’m so thrilled that I’ve kicked those ill-placed feelings of resentment and fallen so completely in love with my second little princess, my Squish, my Lia Bee. This is the way it’s supposed to be, and I’m finally 100% there.

Getting Big

I’m feeling a whole lot better lately since I only have two doses left of my high-priced Keflex and my girly parts are no longer in constant agony. My IUD and I are getting along better these days, less pain and cramping all the time and more no-fuss birth control, which, SCORE. I wouldn’t mind being knocked up again, but oh man would Andrew be one unhappy camper. This way, when we have our next baby it will have been a (mostly) mutual decision and he can be happy too (or at least pretend).

My mom is over visiting for a while, which is nice. The days go by a lot faster with someone to talk to besides myself and a toddler who mostly asks questions and a baby who still only gurgles. Today’s agenda was grocery shopping, most of which I still haven’t put away because my pantry needs to be re-organized (yes, I organize my pantry) and cleaned, and I just don’t feel energized enough for that tonight. Especially when I know tomorrow’s agenda includes hauling ass to get ready for Julianna’s 6-month well-check at 9:45 in the morning.

On that note, when did my little precious newborn get so big? Big enough to be learning to crawl? I can’t believe how fast the time has gone. I really feel like I was JUST pregnant with her a few weeks ago, and already she’s almost through her first year of life. In a way I feel robbed, because I honestly cannot fathom where the last six months have slipped away to.

More tomorrow… pictures, Julianna’s six-month stats, etc. Now to go clean my pantry. Maybe.

So it turns out I totally DO have a UTI, go me and my bacterial self! I have been prescribed Keflex, an antibiotic that apparently there is no generic form of, and it cost me $35 even with my insurance. That kind of pissed me off, seeing as I’ve never paid more that $5 for a bottle of pills EVER. I talked with the pharmacist, and apparently, Keflex is “safe” for breastfeeding. By safe, they mean it won’t kill my baby, it just might give her some good old fashioned thrush, maybe some diarrhea. As an added bonus, maybe I’ll get a yeast infection. Party in my pants, everyone. Because my life? Is fabulous and you want to be me so badly right now you can hardly contain yourself.

Indication that you are too drugged to be typing a blog: you just spelled ‘diarrhea’ no less than eleven times before deciding that the ‘h’ goes near the end there, and if it doesn’t, it can screw itself. Also, you just invited the entire internet to a party in your pants. Where are your manners tonight?

Anyway, to go with my perpetual IUD-induced uterine bleeding, I now have bladder bleeding, and to go with that I have a smashing migrane headache. I dug out the drugs my OB/GYN prescribed me when Julianna was born, determined to at least feel a bit less craptastic. One was Motrin, one was Vicoden. I took the Motrin and it didn’t do BEANS for my headache, let alone anything else. So I decided, you know what? I’m tired, I’m hurty all over, and I just want to sleep… nice, drug induced sleep. I took a Vicoden with my antibiotic and instead of going to sleep, here I am. Blathering on like an idiot because for one, I wanted some cranberry juice and on the way I found the computer, and two, I may or may not be dreaming right now. I guess if this post is here in the morning, I’ll know for sure. Goodnight, sleep tight, so on and so forth.